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Vol. 6 No. 4, July/August 2004 IIN THIS ISSUE =================================================== =================================================== NICE GIRLS DON'T NEGOTIATE And if you still have not started reading my latest book "DON'T
OIL THE SQUEAKY WHEEL… AND 19 OTHER CONTRARIAN WAYS TO IMPROVE
YOUR LEADERSHIP EFFECTIVENESS" =================================================== Hi, my name is Kevin and I have a need to be liked. Kevin was the founder and president of a fast growing entrepreneurial company that he literally grew from nothing to about $200 million in sales and 160 employees in about 18 years. Because of its explosive growth Kevin decided that he needed to hire an executive team of five managers to help him manage the company and take it to the next level. For some reason or another though very few of the new managers lived up to Kevin's expectation. They were either too aggressive, too slow, too dependent, didn't work hard enough…and the list goes on. As a result the new management team was disillusioned, dissatisfied, and demoralized, while Kevin couldn't figure out what their problem was. I was brought in as a consultant to straighten out the mess, and quickly discovered that it had less to do with the new management team--true not all were the right fit--and much more with Kevin. Kevin--was just not okay inside of his own skin, which prevented him from making the hard decisions that would cause others to "dislike" him. That in turn prevented him from holding his team members accountable--you can't give away what you don't have--and from making unpopular decisions, which were required in order to grow the company. (For example two of the new managers were not the right fit and several others who had helped build the company had outgrown the company and needed to be asked to leave.) This need-to-be-liked issue prevented Kevin from doing the right thing for the company. And everything--as you can well imagine--went downhill from there. The moral of that story: if you want to serve as a Contrarian Leader you have to be selfish and work on #1 first. For example, in the previous case Kevin had to discover internal mechanisms that would enable him to like himself so that he would have a lesser need to have himself externally validated. (If you are like Kevin, remember that your goal should be to be respected not necessarily liked, since many decisions that effective leaders need to make, may be very unpopular with at least some of the people.) In other words, you've got to get your own head screwed on right first, before you can help anyone else be a great follower. And it is those followers who are responsible for 85 percent of your success. So let's start by looking at the specific foundational habits you must develop if you want to be an effective Contrarian Leader. (Heads-up: these will also make you a more effective spouse, parent, lover etc. So read these carefully. Better yet start working on these right now! Know Thyself It's been around since the beginning of time. However, self-awareness is without a doubt the most important leadership attribute. Without it, the other skills won't do you much good. Unfortunately it is very difficult to develop a keen awareness of your own feelings and emotions. After all, we create the "reality" that we want, and whatever does not align with our reality we distort or treat as exceptions. In other words, we all see and hear what we want to see and hear, even when it does not serve us well. Highly effective Contrarian Leaders are acutely aware of their own feelings and emotions, as well as their strengths and weaknesses, and are able to tune into those feelings and deal with them in a non-defensive and constructive manner. They are also keenly aware of how their moods and emotions affect others. (To get greater insight into how to sharpen this elusive skill you may wish to read my book "Make It a Winning Life--Success Strategies for Life, Love and Business.") Take Ownership Tuning into your own emotions is tough to do. Of course it is even
more difficult to take ownership of your feelings. (That employee is
worthless. The customers are a big pain. The CFO got me really upset
. . . enough said?) And without ownership nothing--yes, I do mean nothing--will
change! Taking responsibility for everything that is going on in your
organization allows you to choose a more constructive emotional response.
Managing yourself means that you've developed the ability to deal with
the leaderships' ups and downs--but especially the downs--in a constructive
and positive manner, by "reframing" and by interrupting "triggers"
that take you on a downward spiral. Leaders who have not mastered this
skill are frequently depressed, worry incessantly, and suffer from seemingly
insurmountable obstacles and stressors. On the other hand, those who
know how to manage their emotions experience just as many "downers"
but they are able to focus on the good stuff and bounce back. University
of Pennsylvania professor Marty Seligman's research makes a strong case
for the importance of developing a positive explanatory style (PES).
People who have PES as opposed to NES--a negative explanatory style--have
developed the unique ability to reframe their setbacks and tragedies
by finding the good in the bad. In the next issue of this eNewsletter we'll review five other habits you must master if you want to serve as a highly effective Contrarian Leader: Motivate Thyself, Empathize with Others, Develop Charisma, Be Honest and Kill Your Ego. SOURCE: Based in part on Chapter 3 of my new book Don't Oil the Squeaky Wheel and 19 Other Contrarian Ways to Improve Your Leadership Effectiveness, recently released by McGraw-Hill. Take advantage of my special offer. =================================================== NEW BOOK: Don't Oil the Squeaky Wheel and 19 Other Contrarian Ways to Improve Your Leadership Effectiveness, 2004, by W. J. Rinke. Publisher Price: $14.95. Advance praise: "Tells you what you need to know to win in the
game of leadership in these turbulent times." POWERFUL CD: How to Motivate Employees to Achieve Peak Performance. Publisher Price: $19.95. This LIVE audio by yours truly (~60 mins.) will teach you how to build a positive organizational culture that will achieve quantum leaps in performance, productivity and profitability. Both book and CD--$24.90 + s/h. SAVE $10.00! ------------------------- Offer expires 9/1/2004 --------------------------- To order log onto http://www.WolfRinke.com/Special.html =================================================== Since I was the first to arrive at our company one morning, I answered
the telephone. When the caller asked for accounting, I explained that
it was before regular business hours, but that I would help if I could. =================================================== Here is the remaining list of full day seminars that I will be presenting for the rest of 2004 that maybe open to you, especially if your company is a member of the Institute of Management Studies (IMS). Contact the Chairperson for additional information. Increasing Your Personal Effectiveness Winning Management: Building a Peak Performance Workplace =================================================== =================================================== If this was forwarded to you and you would like to receive your own
FREE subscription click above.
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